Netflix And Self Disadvantagement
If you have any streaming service, you know the deal. It probably happens because you just wrapped up a favorite series. You open up the app and click around a bit to see what’s new, or what’s old that might be interesting that you missed previously.
You move from show to show, and the little preview starts almost immediately, and nearly every one of them feels like a slightly repackaged version of the one before.
You could probably apply that previous sentence in a variety of ways, but what I mean specifically in this case is the tenor of dialogue that one might call snarky, sassy, or snide. Over and over and over… Do you see it too?
I can’t quite figure out if it’s more symptom or cause in our culture.
This blog isn’t meant to flesh out that answer. It does seem like a somewhat accurate reflection of the culture, though, doesn’t it?
I’ve stated in previous posts that I believe we actually agree with each other far more than we think in this cultural moment, and that I don’t experience people at each other’s throats in my day to day life. Am I just being inconsistent? I don’t think so. Here’s what I mean…
For the sake of my argument, I am dividing our societal interactions into three categories: private communication, public communication, and broadcast communication.
“Broadcast communication” would include everything from Netflix shows to blogs to social media posts. These are the things we purposefully put out into the world for others to see and hear. I would include things that might not be broadcast via electronic medium here, as well, like speeches at rallies, materials written in pen and ink, etc.
By “public communication,” I mean those interactions in the public sphere, between individuals who may come from different perspectives and backgrounds, but may not even know it about one another. These are the communications you have in order to get things done every day- sales calls, conversations with neighbors, parent-teacher meetings, ordering lunch, etc.
By “private communication,” I mean our conversations with those we perceive to be “within the camp” so to speak. These might not always be in private. They may happen in public, within earshot of others. They may even happen with the intent of others hearing! However, the point is that the communication is happening with a person who we see as “on our side.”
Obviously, not everything fits cleanly into categories. You may have conversations with someone “close,” like a family member, who doesn’t feel very “on your side.” I’d probably qualify that more like public communication, where you might try to stay out of controversial territory. That probably gives a clue as to which types of interactions I think are acerbic and which might lean toward the collegial.
I don’t think the Netflix shows full of snark and nastiness are indicative of our “public communication,” in which we are perhaps forced to try to cooperate and get along. A quick glance through social media would say that our personal “broadcast communication” often veers into acrimonious territory. I believe that much contemporary “private communication” does as well (and I think we are in a unique season of it, though backbiting, gossip, and generally caustic types of speech will always be around).
I am so tired of snark.
I am hoping, and praying that there are some of you out in Substack-land who feel similarly!
I don’t want to watch a single second of anything else with adults reciting sassy dialogue that sounds like it came from a Disney-channel tween “dramedy.”
I don’t want to even glance at yet another social media post of derision toward the wickedness or foolishness of your political or social enemies (even if I agree with you on absolutely everything else).
I understand that some snark might come out in private conversations. I think you have to have a safe space in the world to use some good natured sarcasm about the parts of life that are just bafflingly nonsensical from your perspective. But I can’t tell you how much I would pay to never again overhear a millisecond of that particular tone of voice that goes along with “And then she said _____! And then I said ______!”
What if we just agreed to de-snark?
It would be easier said than done- much easier said (or blogged) than done- but I think it is worth considering.
There have certainly been times in my life when I’ve been a chief offender. Snark and sarcasm in a particular context, moment, and way can at times help to elucidate the ridiculousness of a situation. However, my sense is that this era, overflowing with cynicism is not it.
I am convinced that the snark must be met with either earnestness or silence.
It is so very tempting when bitter, mocking words begin to rain on you (or “your people”), to return the favor. When you feel like you, or people like you are being scorned or insulted (perhaps especially when you know or suspect it’s happening in those private or “private” contexts) it feels nearly impossible to not circle the wagons of defense around your tribe and fire back.
Sadly, our reciprocation not only adds to the general atmosphere of enmity, but often targets new people, merely reminiscent of those who attacked us, who can then repeat the cycle and rope a few more wounded wounders into it, and so on.
Scripture has a better way.
I think it’s fair to say that 1 Corinthians 6 is a similar context, though it is talking about relationships between supposed Christ followers that have gotten so bad they’re suing each other in court.
The Apostle Paul says, instead of retaliating, “why not rather be wronged?”
In my saner moments, when I’m really consciously clinging to the hope of the gospel, I’d rather be wronged. I think there may have been a few moments in life when I chose not to fire back or even defend myself because of this. There have certainly been plenty more when I was snark king, and unleashed a sardonic torrent of ridicule. I can’t think of a single moment like that which actually gained anything for me, though, except for embarrassment in retrospect.
As stated above, I know that sarcasm and snark and gossip and general mean-spiritedness will not be snuffed out until the new heavens and the new earth.
But in this day and time, I believe that Jesus followers who refuse that path are reflecting the gospel in a powerful way, maybe the most powerful way for our societal celebration of scorn. “They” might deserve it. But what will it get you?
Nothing of worth…
Nothing that lasts…
On the other hand, continuing with the theme1 of how to move forward in our current cultural context, with things that you and I can control, in ways that “push back the darkness” preferring to be wronged will profit us so much.
There’s a tremendous quote I use often from theologian Bruce Waltke. He says the Bible describes these categories of people in this way, “The righteous are willing to disadvantage themselves to advantage the community; the wicked are willing to disadvantage the community to advantage themselves.”
That is so contrary to our natural desires, and yet, when Jesus takes over your heart, this is who you want to be- one willing to receive contempt like him, without letting loose on your despisers for their own wickedness, so that God might be glorified, and others might know life in him (maybe even some of those despisers), and your own joy in him might take root in a way it never can, if those acrid words of hostility make it past your lips.
I wholeheartedly believe that even a small amount of people committing to this would make a significant difference in our world. I don’t know if it’s something I would personally see the effects of, necessarily, but I believe it would change things, from a spiritual perspective.
What do you think? Is “de-snarking” a possibility?
UPDATES ON UNION ATHENS
We had a great first week in our new location, with a guest preacher who we’ll be seeing a lot more in the coming months!
My friend Zion Brown will be helping us with outreach here in Athens some over the spring and summer. We’re excited to have him coming alongside of us (and so grateful to the wonderful folks he reports to in his current full time gig, who really cared for him and for us in making this possible)!
We’re also excited for what may be an annual tradition for our team. Though Christmas and Thanksgiving are popular days to serve, we figured Easter Sunday probably was not. So, we’ll be serving food at Bigger Vision, downtown that day and then worshiping later, in the afternoon!
If you don’t have a church right now, or you just want to see what we’re up to, join us to celebrate the hope of Jesus in his resurrection this Easter!
How true. Well stated. Both convicting and encouraging. Thanks!